One, two, three, four Can we have an honest conversation Underneath the surface where we've been stayin'? Where it's comfortable, where we play it safe And we try so hard not to make mistakes Spend a lot of time but I don't really know you Think we've reached a point where I wanna show you Who I really am, what I think about What makes me smile, what brings me down, oh I guess I feel some hesitation Before we say those words Sometimes love is an empty invitation Sometimes love is a word that's used in vain Sometimes love is just something that people say everyday And I don't want it that way We've both been in situations Where we woke up at a revelation But a little voice said it wouldn't last Hey don't walk away, leave it in the past, oh We wrestle with the reservations Now we're finding it hard to say those words Sometimes love is an empty invitation Sometimes love is a word that's used in vain Sometimes love is just something that people say everyday And I don't want it that way, and I don't want it that way Sometimes love is an open invitation Sometimes love is a word that heals the pain Sometimes love is more than just something that people say everyday And I want you that way, oh, oh love, well I want you that way

I could listen to them all day. They sound so amazing together!

I am so in love with this song.

There's a story old, that has often been told,
Of how our Saviour died, as they nailed His hands,
He cried they don't understand,
As the blood flowed from His side.

How can you refuse Him now, how can you refuse Him now,
How can you turn away from His side,
With tears in His eyes, on the cross there He died,
How can you refuse Jesus now.

As He hung there on the tree, He prayed for you and me,
There was no one His pain to ease,
Before he died, He faintly cried,
Father forgive them please.

One of the most priceless gems you will find in God's Word is His voice. That's because He speaks to us through His Word as we read it or hear it. In fact, we can't really learn to recognise God's voice to our soul if we are not hearing Him speak to us first in His Word. The more you hear it, the easier it is to recognise, and the less chance you will accept a counterfeit.

There were countless times in my early walk with the Lord when I was still suffering from depression and anxiety that I turned to His Word. All it took was reading the Bible for a few minutes, and I would feel calm and hopeful again. That's because the Word straightens out our mind and soul and helps us think clearly about things. It leads us away from self-destructive thoughts and enables us to enjoy a sense of well-being. It gives us hope and keeps us on course. It provides us a solid foundation upon which to build a life of wholeness. Ask God to meet you in His Word every day. He looks forward to that, and He wants you to also.

There is no way to draw closer to God, or have a clean and right heart before Him, or be a forgiving person, or walk in obedience in His ways, or take control of your mind, or stand against the enemy, or make Jesus Lord of your life unless you are in the Word of God every day. It's your compass. Your guide. You can't get where you need to go without it.

The Power of a Praying Woman, pp90-91, Stormie Omartian

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Every woman has needs. But many of us are guilty of looking to other people to meet them - especially the men in our lives. Too often we expect them to meet the needs that only God can fill. And then we are disappointed when they can't. We expect too much from them when our expectations should be in God.

My friend Lisa Bevere (author of "kissed the girls and made them cry") expressed it best when she said that for centuries women have "wrestled and waged war with the sons of Adam in an attempt to get them to bless us and affirm our value. But this struggle has left us frustrated at best... In the end, it is all a senseless and exhausting process in which both parties lose. It is not the fault of the sons of Adam; they cannot give us the blessing we seek, and we have frightened them by giving them so much power over our souls. We must learn that the blessings we truly need come only from God."

We will never be happy until we make God the source of our fulfillment and the answer to our longings. He is the only one who should have power over our souls. We have to put our expectations in the Lord and not in other things or people. I know this is easier said than done. So let's start with the easy part. Let's say to God, " Lord I look to You for everything I need in my life. Help me to put all my expectations in You." And whenever you are disappointed because your needs are not being met, talk to yourself and say, "My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him" (Psalm 62:5). Then tell God about all your needs and everything that is in your heart. Don't worry, He won't be surprised or shocked. He already knows. He is just waiting to hear it from you.

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But after I thought for a while, I feel that its only fair he expects that of me if I'm not working! If not, we'll take turns with the cooking! Is it fairer that way? Friends, what do you think? :)

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Many other exciting events coming up for the both of us. 

Besides all these plans, we have also been working on understanding each other better. And honestly, I am amazed at our progress. It really is like taking our relationship/friendship to a whole new level.

So thankful :)

I'm sitting here alone in my room, staring into my computer thinking of what to say. As hard as it is to believe, I find it difficult to convey what I feel sometimes, and settle for telling you that "I love you". It might be starting to sound old, but trust me, they hold significant meaning. 

I've not been entirely comfortable with participating fully with orientation, because I keep feeling I need to distance myself away from people. I feel guilty, that I am having fun while you're cramming for exams. 

I appreciate you telling me not to do so, and to make friends. I know it's hard for you sometimes to feel secure, but know that I am with you heart and mind, if not physically.

I'm extremely glad we've gotten over some of the unhappiness that arose after your celebration, and i'm thankful that we are better for it. You've brought me so much happiness, and I hope that I do the same for you too. 

I forsee we won't spend as much time with each other as we used to, but that's the nature of school, and we'll make the best of it. I'm gonna do my level best in school, and I know you can do it too. You've done so much already, what with the scholarship you got and all. Make your family and I proud of you. 

With all my love,

Shaun

Pardon the messy structure of this note as I'm typing this at 2.10AM. You are now far away in NUS and I miss having you around.

You have been so busy with everything in life - family, school and work. Yet you miraculously found the time for me - from the planning of my 21st birthday party all the way till it ended and even for the afterparty (whatever that was).

I am thankful for you yet am so ashamed to be blind to your many hidden/behind the scenes decisions and actions. You had done so much for me to ensure the smooth running of my party, even if it put you in inconvenience and forcing you to grow out of your comfort zone to settle petty requests. I have grown used to your always-there presence (that's probably why I find myself struggling so hard now) and your silent support, and have neglected your feelings in the process. These feelings - your feelings - are important and precious to me. I am sorry for the times I had unknowingly pushed you away and made you feel under-appreciated or unimportant.

I must say my piece before I go to bed tonight, because I know there will not be a proper or good time for me to say all these during the next few days.

Thank you for all these: the preplanning stage, decision to hold my party at Evans lounge, followed up with Carmen to get my event booked, listening to my daily complaints and rantings, dealing with my overboard requests of a band and a balloon arch and helping me fulfil these wishes. Updating and managing my Facebook page for me, and sending message reminders to everyone.

Thank you for my lovely birthday present. I may not have seemed very appreciative or enthusiastic about the watch but it has grown on me and I love it more each new day. Knowing you'll be wearing a similar one fills my heart with gladness that I cannot describe.

Thank you for all these: actual day and execution - rushing down to the salon to accompany me do my hair despite being busy. Constantly reassuring me that everything will turn out well and fun, buying us a quick lunch and whizzing down to CCAB for the decorations to be done. Inflating the balloons and attempting to give them shape. Welcoming guests as they come in. Willingly taking charge of things (like the maid of honor for a wedding) and ensuring that guests arrive safely. Holding on to my phone and answering all the calls that come in, even though you do not know most of the callers. Settling minor hiccups like insufficient beverages for guests. Rallying my cousins to help with cleanup in the end, ensuring all is good and stayed till the very end (you were the last to leave the room) making sure that things were returned to its original positions. And many other things I may have missed out or am unaware of.

You had done such a great job, far surpassing what my best friends and mother had done. And you continued to ensure the smooth running of my party - all these despite you being upset with me!

And although you didn't feel too well yourself, you took it upon yourself to talk to me, send the stubborn me home, stayed till I was safe and happy, and surprising me a few other times throughout the night. I had great fun opening my presents with you, talking about things, and just sitting beside you.

Thank you for all these, you're wonderful and I just want to tell you that I love you. Not for the things you have done for me but for how you are to me. Yourself. Brutally honest and always striving for the best for us and the future.

I don't know how to end this so it may sound abrupt.

Have fun during the next few days in orientation camp, don't be afraid to let your guard down to have some fun. And finally, let us do our best academically for ourselves and our families.

Now I can rest.

With love from Carissa.

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